Taze.Us, this is Matty the monkey. He is an up and coming animal actor. Apparently he get’s more pussy than I do. Can I get a monkey taze? -upenn

BUDDY: Technically he is black from the waste down so I’m hoping he’s not packing more heat than you too.

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Dear Taze Army, I was on a long flight to London and I noticed this sign in the bath room. I thought it would be taze worthy.

ROLAID: If I saw this in ANY bathroom I would go out of my way to piss all over the rim.

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Taze.Us, This looks like the ever famous Steve Aoki lookalike. What is it with asians these days thinking they are trendy from the 70’s? taaze. -xodopplarox

BUDDY: I think this might be a halloween costume for “Disco Bruce Lee.” But anyway, hopefully the girl’s aren’t going back to the 70’s or we are gonna start seeing an influx of hairy bush. Nice shoes.

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Taze.Us, 8 pasty white girls and 1 cracked out Damon Wayons  make for a great taze. -jelloshooter.

BUDDY: I knowwwww whoo hasss the scarrrieeessttt hallowweeeeen costume.

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Taze.us, this is Jenny. She’s from Iowa…and she’s a whore. -rm

BUDDY: Check this cornfed hooker out, slobbin on cobs & practicin for the knobs.

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Dear Taze.us.org.net/strokes,  I was recently browsing my favorite porn websites and I came across a picture octomom’s box. I thought I would share it with the taze army.

ROLAID:  That’s what 8 kids will do to your front end / box. Solid taze… nice work.

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Taze.Us , these are girls from a local sorority at UCSD. Which one would you taze?

BUDDY: Judging by how many blown out sluts there are in this picture, I think I will throw a sugar glazed donut in the air and taze whoever’s tits bounce the most when they are all reaching for the extra calories.

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Taze.us, these kids roll around the streets of New Orleans in their hot wheel ATV. Hot wheel’s as in stolen off the 08 Lincoln the next town over. This is a good come up. Taze these ghetto asses.

BUDDY: Who rides ATV’s in the projects? Someone needs a make a song TIPPIN ON FO FO’s YAMAHA ON FO FO’s who

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hey taze us, I was wondering if you would rather bang it out with this montana beauty or have a 3 some w/these sorrority sisters from university of montana?? -406mob

ROLAID:  I’d rather pull my pork to redtube.com. Latina maid is my favorite.

BUDDY:  I’ll bang it out with the beauty if she lets me straighten her tarantula.

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Dear taze us, I am writing to you so I can introduce you to Edmond Washington’s very own slob killer. I don’t need to elaborate on this nickname, I think the pictures speak for themselves…. I was just really wondering your take on a girl like this.
*Molly M

ROLAID: Slob killer…?  This girl likes to take down fat dudes or what ?

BUDDY: The only thing she is taking down is the #3 at Carl’s  Jr with crisp cut fries. Fat ass.

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